December 27, 2008 at 7:16 am (harriet)
Tags: anticipation, giving, harriet, love, waiting
The moment before I always see her, whether it’s for the first time in months or the first time in a few hours, there’s always that dreadful anticipation; I sit around scouring high and low for something to do and nothing feels nearly as fun, awesome, productive, or exciting as being with my lover. I hate this period before seeing her. I’m on pins and needles the whole time, my stomach feels empty, my nerves are tingly- everything sucks about waiting to see my love.
It’s an absolute beautiful feeling though when I see her. All those things previously are gone and a fulfillment takes over that can’t be found anywhere else.
I love my girlfriend. From my heart, to my mind, to my body- all parts of me are saying “I love you” and I truly do give every single bit of myself to her.
Here’s to the most amazing weekend of my whole life.
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December 26, 2008 at 7:04 am (harriet)
Tags: airports, harriet, waiting
7AM. December 26th.
I tried SO hard to sleep in. I really did!
But hey. I just can’t do it. Not when my lover is going to be here in twenty seven hours. I am WAY too excited to see her. 
And you know what? That right there? That is suuuch an understatement. There aren’t words to show how freaking pumped I am to kiss her and hug her and be with her.
But… I guess I could try?
If I had to put it into words, I would say I am so freaking, most absolutely insanely excited beyond any measure or reason that cannot be fathomed by the tangible mind which is then amplified to extents no man has ever known before because no man has ever loved a woman the way I love Harriet.
?? What do you think? That did a little justice…
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December 25, 2008 at 5:57 pm (life)
Tags: airplanes, christmas, harriet, love, minus the bear, music, planet of ice, the UC
This has been by far the happiest Christmas ever for me.
Today we acted like a family. I actually felt some connectedness here.
And I got a ton of amazing new music.
Nope- I don’t care much about the other gifts I got. Sure, they’re wonderful- I’m so grateful for them! I love them all. But two things have made me as happy as I am now: a $25 iTunes giftcard and Planet Ice by Minus the Bear. I’ve now got tons of great new music in my possession and it’s making me so excited. I haven’t had this much awesomeness to listen to for a long while! It’s rejuvenating.
Anyone who knows me knows how much music can excite me. I really haven’t done much for the past two hours. I’ve honestly just basically lied in bed listening to music and I’ve loved it! I need food. And I need Harriet. But that’s going to be satisfied as well! All in all, it’s been a very good Christmas.
Tomorrow will be ace! I’m going shopping in the morning with mom (selling my 360! and buying a USB cable for my new, much-needed printer!), packing for going back to the UC, seeing Marley and Me with the Morrows and my family, and then GOING to the UC! There I shall prepare everything for… THE NEXT DAY! Whennnnn…? HARRIET ARRIVES!
I’m pretty sure I’m also only as jumpy and excited as how I know my lover will be here so so so SO soon! I love having this music because I know it’ll make the time pass by oh so nicely. It’ll be easy to make it until Saturday. I hope Harriet feels the same. Just knowing that she’ll be out of Houston and in my arms in just a short amount of time should hopefully make the time pass by quickly. I have yet to really talk to her today- I’ve been busy, she’s been busy- I’m dying to hear how her day’s been! I really wanna share with her how happy I am too. I’m just… feeling good. Feeling optimistic. Who doesn’t want to share that with their one and only?
Okay, dinner shall be ready soon.
Take care.
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December 25, 2008 at 7:35 am (Uncategorized)
Today’s Christmas.
Does it really feel like it though?
Not quite.
Christmas means different things to different people. No matter how you slice it, it’s an important holiday- it comes only once a year, there’s tons of folklore attached to it, everyone makes a big deal out of buying presents, the decorations and sales are endless– you can’t escape the grand entrance of Christmas into your life every year. But from when we’re young to when we grow old, Christmas has a different meaning.
When I was young, I was all about presents. Man, I remember being so freaking excited to get gifts on Christmas. Seeing those wrapped boxes under the tree was such a warming sight. But as I got older, I started caring about giving more. The gifts were still totally important, but giving was just as awesome! Now I find myself being completely apathetic to the presents. All I want to do is give and watch as the smiles on other people emerge.
But this year it’s different. This year Christmas doesn’t even feel like it’s here.
Christmas is all about family; it’s about being connected to the ones you love most. I’m not with the one I love most. She’s nowhere near me. How can it feel like Christmas? Most of my Christmas shopping was done solely for her, too.
I’m not down about it- I’m going to be seeing her in two days- come over to my house and come see my smile, why don’t you. But I’m just making an observation: today just doesn’t feel like Christmas. My Christmas is coming this Sunday. And I’m most certain it will be the greatest Christmas ever for me.
It’s not like Christmas has ever been that monumental though. I’ve never had the big family parties; I’ve never had the connectedness everyone raves about. Christmas has always been just another day in the year-long trek we go through every three-hundred sixty-five days. But this year it WILL be special for me. I don’t care if it’s not even ON December 25th- point is my lover and I will be celebrating Christmas on a different day, and that day will feel like Christmas- that day will feel special.
I am so incredibly excited. I don’t think I’ve been more excited for anything in my life.
Anyways… off to mass I go! Gosh. I’m still so exhausted. Only got maybe like… seven hours of sleep? I need, need, NEED to rest and sleep today. No excuses!
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December 24, 2008 at 10:59 pm (Uncategorized)
When you can’t be someone’s strength… you go out and find someone or something who can be.
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