Just an updateizzle.

What to say, what to say.  It’s 2:08AM.  Been going to bed around 3 as of late and it MUST STOP.  I’m getting way too tired in the day and my bed here just isn’t comfortable enough so as to allow me to rest up properly.  Every day pretty recently I’ve been having blood-shot eyes by around 8:30, 9PM.  I swore the other day that I’d be going to bed so much earlier, but awesome-ass things just keep emerging and I’m engaged until the super early morning hours.  Tonight’s distraction away from sleep was Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2.  Yeah, I’m pretty sure blogs, forums, Facebook statuses, and Twitters are all a-buzz with MW2 updates.  But shit.  It really is a cultural phenomenon within the gaming world.  Jon told me that 5 million people bought it at its LAUNCH at MIDNIGHT.  5 million people in the U.S. lined up for it.  Ain’t that crazy?  Let’s do the math on that.

$59.99 x 5,000,000 = $299,950,000.  Yeah.  This game is equally making over $300 mil.  Isn’t that crazy to think about?  Just on the FIRST MORNING it amassed $300 mil.  To date, Men In Black, the movie, has made less than $600 million.  Movies are universal enjoyment… video games are definitely a niche.  To me that’s pretty stellar.  Like, just imagine that kinda success.  I know my name isn’t attributed to anything jaw-dropping.  I mean, I’ve had some poetry published… and I’ve had my music on the radio twice… but whatever.  Nothing worth writing home about… yet.

Definitely this past week I’ve been seeing myself in a different light musically.  It pretty much all started Monday with my performance of One More Time at Kafein.  My stage antics still suck and I can’t talk to an audience worth a damn… but I still killed that song and Joe was definitely singing it long after I was done playing.  His words at the Harrison stop were, “Dammit!  That song is so catchy!”  You’re damn right its. :)  And then yesterday at band practice with Brett and Shawn, I had Brett saying multiple times, “I swear dude, I feel like I could cry- you’re amazing!”.  And jamming last night with Joe at 1 in the morning?  Yeah.  I came up with some super sick stuff on drums.  Oh!  And back up a bit, I believe I had Paul grinning from ear to ear when he heard the drums I wanted to add to his new songs for the Stellanecks.  Just… fuck yeah.  I’m in a very good place musically, and now that I’m taking the time as of late to really practice my instruments, I’m starting to feel very, very accomplished.

Speaking of Paul, I met with him last night to discuss what’s going to be happening with his band the Stellanecks and the recording of their album, “Sweep the Sky.”  It was a really good brainstorming session and the one thing I loved most was his comment about me.  I forgot why he said this to Dom (the other member), but Paul’s words were, “Dude, I know Mort.  He’s gonna give us all he’s got and work harder for us than anyone else possible, just busting his balls to get us the best album we can.”  It was really endearing to know that that’s how he views me.  Lately I’ve been feeling kinda lame in terms of my success, but I really feel like it’s just been due to a lack of inspiration.  Nothing has been inspiring me as of late.  All my fuel used to come from Harriet’s love.  It just got me going like crazy.  And without it I need to find some sort of new muse.  The last album I heard that got me amped was This Will Be the Death of Us by Set Your Goals.  While Raditude, Armistice, and even Lost In Suburbia have been super sick albums that I’m a huge fan of… they haven’t inspired me.  And shit.  It’s been forever since I’ve seen a movie or an anime that really got my creative juices pumping.  I’ve exhausted a lot of good art this past year… it’s safe to say I’m in a dryspell and just need to let this drought happen.

So what exactly AM I doing creatively these days? I’m playing in Brett Cooper’s band on bass, I’m reading/playing through a Motown Bass Charts book, I’m playing for the Window Theatre, I’ll be recording the Stellanecks, I’m reading The Gunseller by Hugh Laurie, I’m trying to write blogs about zen teachings, and I’ll be devoting a lot of time very soon to experimenting with Pro Tools 7 LE.  Word up.

Right now I’m listening to the music from Samurai Champloo.  Such good music… such a great anime.  I miss those days where I had so much new/good anime to consume.  I’m at that point in my life where it’s very difficult to find a new anime because it seems I’ve watched all the good ones.  I think the last show I watched that was great was like… Magikano.  And that was last semester.  Sad day!  I haven’t even watched a Japanese film in forever.  Been meaning to watch My Neighbors the Yamadas and 9 Souls with Harriet.  Hopefully that’ll still happen.  But I wanna watch something I haven’t SEEN.  I tried watching this documentary on Akihabara, but it was just such a shoddy production that I didn’t have to determination to sit through it.  Twas cool… nothing more.

However, tonight I started watching this fucked up movie called SALO (or, the 120 Days of Sodom).  I really don’t care for it, but the stuff happening on screen is so interesting and depraved that I can’t bring myself to turn it off.  Basically, it’s this true story (I think- otherwise there’s no way a plotline of this caliber would make it onto the Criterion Collection) about how these boys and girls were captured and taken away to a private Italian Villa where these fascist leaders set up a type of sexual retreat where they were allowed to do whatever they pleased to the kids.  And basically it’s a TON of homosexual sodomy occurring randomly and usually painfully.  It’s not exactly cringe-worthy… but it is most definitely one of those movies that’ll have you saying, “What the fuck?” quite a bit.  I dunno.  Do I recommend it?  Nah.  But if you’re looking for something controversial and something that’s gonna stomp, jump, and destroy a bunch of taboos- then Salo’s your movie.

Yeah.  p.s.- it’s been a while since I’ve seen a great movie.  Anti Christ is totally one of the best movies of the year/potentially one of my all-time faves- but it was just so insane that I feel like I didn’t enjoy it WHILE I was there.  It’s one of those movies that yes- if I think about it, it’s a beautifully haunting film.  But I have a hard time admitting that it was so good just because of the subject matter.  Haha… I really do want to see it again so badly- that imagery is STILL stuck with me.  But at the same time, the movie is exhausting to sit through.  Part of me doesn’t know if I can have the strength to endure it’s brief hour and a half runtime again.  Fantastic Mr. Fox and 2012 are out.  I really want to see those.  Fantastic Mr. Fox is reviewing incredibly well and 2012 just looks like an onslaught of mindless fun.  Saw Donna today- she said This Is It is phenomenal and Kirby said the same, so you know me and the Duemigs will be making a trip to the theatre for that one.

Anyways, this has been a pretty lame blog and I’m super tired, so I should just grab some shuteye.  But… even though I find these types of blogs “stupid” nowadays… I really should do them more often.  I’m going to kick myself so hard when I have basically all of my highschool career documented here through my WordPress blogs, yet none of my collegiate career.  Granted, there’s been a lot going on that I really have purposefully chosen to neglect writing about.  But I can’t keep doing that.  Life is filled with joy, sadness, triumphs, defeat- I need to capture that all.

Goodnight, then.

p.s.- Chris wrote me today saying how badly he wants to just be able to hang with me 2 to 3 times a week, chilling out and just talking with some good music on in the background.  There’s a man I wish more than anything that I could do the same with.  Fuck that ocean that separates us.  Haha.. and I have to include that the kid has no problem admitting he wants so badly to be related to me.  Now that’s raditude.

A Story About Crystals

Along with making this album, I really want to document every little piece about it.  Looking back on these blogs is one of my favorite things ever.  I love reconnecting with old thoughts and seeing what my life was like one year, two years, even three years ago.  I plan to put more heart and soul into this record than I ever have and along with it, I want to make sure not a single thing gets forgotten- from great recording days, to recording techniques- to song ideas and personal thoughts during the process.

With that said, here is a little story about the song Crystals, the first song I’m recording.

I wrote Crystals over two years ago.  It was during Senior year when I was making lots of instrumentals.  It started off as a super pretty acoustic song that I was convinced was one of the high points of my creativity.  A mix of heavy-reverbed guitar parts, harmonics, dissonate secondary guitar parts, and a power-chord chorus made for a unique trip I was very proud of.  When I first wrote it I wanted to add vocals so badly, but the first batch I came up with just didn’t sit well.  I thought my voice wasn’t suited to the song.  Trying to give it the treatment it deserved I told Allen to write vocals.  He said he loved the song and would be so happy to, but after loads and loads of time gone by, that never happened and the song ended up being my own.  It wasn’t until I was preparing the tracklist for my album, “Steal the Sky” that I listened to it and realized, “Hey… not only are these vocals not bad… they’re great!”  After not listening to the song with vocals for so long, I had finally realized what I’d written were ingenious and the lyrics were incredibly awesome too.  So I threw it on the album and when I formed Shift In Fade with Tim, it became one of our most practiced/loved songs.  Then when we played it live at UIC last year, I knew more than ever that an electric treatment for it had to happen.  Now finally after two years of having this song in my belt, I’m finally allowing it to see the light of the day the way it was meant to.

The lyrics for Crystals are a bit harsh.  The music is bittersweet, telling its own story of tragedy with an air optimism, and I wanted to capture that also with the words that were to join it.  I wrote it about a failed relationship and how the male (aka, me) was moving on and trying to be a better man.  Sure, I was wronged, but so what?  You live and you learn and you keep on moving.  The first verse really paints a picture of the girl in the relationship being the “bad person” and the guy being kind of sarcastic… hence the line, “And giving you something new to despise, it’s me in the room with a faint glow of gloom, I’m ready for this.”  I wanted to convey the idea that I don’t take being screwed with very lightly.  I’m a rather reserved person- but I’m also incredibly proud when my well-being is attacked.  I wanted that first verse to convey the fiery, sarcastic demeanor that can overtake me when I throw caution to the wind.

The next verse, however, takes a bit of a spin and shows the more sensitive side to a breakup.  The story goes that the guy and the girl attempt to save what they have but it just doesn’t work out and in the end it’s a whirlwind of fights and ultimately a bad separation.  But the one thing that is made clear the whole way through is that it’s the girl’s fault and the guy isn’t going to let this win over him- he’s going to keep his life intact and become a better person from the failure that’s befallen him.

In the end, every word was written from a place that hadn’t been visited by me in a long time.  I wrote it about my breakup with Ellen and how she just left me with no warning.  It was just one day, “I don’t love you anymore,” and my life up and changed so drastically so quickly.. and I had to adapt or I wouldn’t survive.

The chorus includes the word “fuck” because since Idiot Ambush, I hadn’t used a single curse word in any of my songs… and Decision Made, one of my most favorite songs I’ve ever written includes a swear almost every line.  All my songs as RTA were so flowery and poetic.  I wanted to write something that had a little edge… and Crystals was my answer.
“Say goodbye, tonight could be our greatest last fight where you decide to paint the walls with your fucked up lies.”

And that, ladies and gentlemen is the story of Crystals. :-)

The High-dive.

Something big is coming. I’m too tortured, too inspired, too hurt, too passionate, too driven, too stifled, too dreamy, and too creative to not make something extraordinary.

Love-Making Music.

I posted a new song on the myspace. http://www.myspace.com/romancingtheangels 

It’s called Reverberating Heart.  It’s an instrumental song- nice and short.  I write instrumentals because as I’m writing here on wordpress, I often have an idea for what kind of song I would love to have playing in the background.  Beautiful Girl and Reverberating Heart are products of those two.  And I must say, I’m working on two very amazing songs right now.  The electric version of my song Spring is going to sound incredible and my song Where You Should Be is the most honest song I’ve written to date.  I’ve got the acoustic version all done, mixed, and prepared to be listened to… but I’m not ready to showcase it.  It’s been done for the past two weeks.  I’m thinking I’ll keep this one closer to me until the electric version is good and done.  

Music writing has been on the up and up for me lately.  Expect something incredibly new and special this summer.  I officially started working on a new, secretive project I’m telling no one about. 

Cheers!

p.s.- I am sexually frustrated to the nth degree.  Just had to throw that one out there.  It’s that bad right now.

I Be Happys!

Aloha my beloveds!

So it’s been a few days since I’ve had anything of substance to say and tonight, sadly, I won’t be breaking that curse.  Just wanted to say hello… write up some quick thoughts and be gone.

First thing’s first: I just finished recording a new song called SPRING that’s going to have both an electric arrangement as well as an acoustic arrangement (which I just finished).  So when you hear both versions, you’re really going to get two totally separate experiences.  I’m super excited for this song- it’s got a lot going for it and the acoustic version should be up within the next 24 hours on the Myspace.

Secondly: BIGGEST MOUTH is in two days and I’m so ready to rock the faces off of 400 bystanders.  Lots of people are coming for the Window Theatre so that’s really heart-warming- I really am apart of something special here.

Thirdly: I’ve got SO much work to do… but I’m taking care of it the best way I can while maintaining my sanity.  

kk- I really have to go… not in the mood to sit here and write.

But I must say… I really have been walking on air ever since I got to talk to Harriet on the phone saturday night.  I couldn’t have desired anything more than to hear her voice… and doing so has made everything in my life feel exponentially cooler, better, more fun- shit, pick a way to describe life as being awesome and that’s what my lover makes me feel.  

And actually, last night I watched the Transparent Veil music video we made together and it just filled me with such happiness.  I got teary-eyed in the opening sequence not because I was being sentimental… or missing Harriet (which I do immensely- don’t get me wrong.)… but because I was THAT happy.  Seeing her on screen being amazing- seeing what her and I can accomplish when we come together- fuck.  We’re incredible!  We’re both not fit for this world because we’re too damned awesome!  We are too… damned… awesome.  And the day where we can finally be together always will absolutely own me and I’ll know I succeeded where it always mattered the most.

But anyways.. if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go continue being happy.  Life’s too short to be anything but.

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